Hey, I didn’t come up with this list but I’m happy to discuss it. You know, as I look down at this InTouch Weekly “Best Hollywood Tits” list, I’m actually kind of embarrassed that I know all these broads. Ahh, who am I kidding, let’s get going on this here list. Now remember, this is the list according to InTouch Weekly.. Not us. But we have plenty to say.
1. Jessica Simpson
Yep, the top titty goes to Jessica Simpson. Wouldn’t have been my choice, but I can live with it.
After all, even her pops said that her ridiculous J’s were top notch.
Now you know you’ve got some serious tittay when pops is peeping them on the slide.
2. Tyra Banks
Say what? Now I know Tyra’s got giant J’s, but does she really belong inside the top three of ALL the breast tah sis in Hollywood?
Sure, her fundamentals are sound and she used to have the rest of the body to go with it. But this is a current J list, not a historical retrospective. The classic Janet song “What Have You Done For Me Lately” seems to come to mind. Answer?
Not enough. Not even close.
3. Scarlett Johansson
Ummmm, HELL YES!!! I’m not sure how it’s possible, but I think this chick is underrated across the board. Maybe it’s the lack of a nude photo shoot and sex tape. Hopefully someone can remedy that. But on the boobs front, she’s LOVELY.
Gotta run that one more gin.
4. Carmen Electra
Huh? Is she even in show business anymore? Why not Pamela Anderson? Hell, Loni Anderson.
And maybe it’s just me, but shouldn’t there be a reasonable expectation that the boobs are actually real if you’re going to call them the 4th best set in all of Hollywood? At least pic a chick with a debate, like Kimmy K…. With Carmen, she’ll tell you her joints are fake. Nah, I can’t support that.
5. Lindsay Lohan
Again, anyone who knows this blog understands my affection for Lindsay Lohan.
She’s one of my favorite celebs and yes, those ridiculous J’s have something to do with it.
On the J front, Lindsay has it all and we’ve seen it all.
You can’t hate, not on this discussion. Definitely underrated and waaaaay under appreciated. Her breasts I mean…lol.
6. Katherine Heigl
I recognize that this near no talent chick would be nothing without the superior boobs, but I just don’t like this broad.
That’s right, I don’t like her, can’t stand that character “Izzy” or whatever it is on Grey’s Anatomy and just can’t get past all the bullshit, yes, even for a pair of advanced J’s like those.
She doesn’t even make my list. Terrible. Though she does look reaaaaaally good in this next pic.
Mercy!
7. Audrina Patridge
Whaaat? You don’t mean to tell me we all feel for that completely transparent “I did some nudes back in the day and now they will be released the day before my show so please make me a star” treatment?
You bet we did. And please note how much she has truly stepped up that belly game. Wow. This babe is everywhere right now. If she had a shred of talent she’d really have something too. Though, I must say, having the nude pictures of her to refer back to whenever I see her looking right in a magazine or online is a nice luxury.
8. Jennifer Aniston
Come on now. Jennifer aint been hot since Ross was hittin’. Again, just too old, too romantic comedy. It’s just not right. Sure she’s got some J’s (NSFW), she wouldn’t be in the business if she didn’t.
But come on. She does not have some of the best tits in all of Hollywood. But these NSFW of Aniston are worth a peep. Half the time she doesn’t even have the best tits in her own relationship. She’s literally not in the same conversation with these other babes. Horrible.
9. Megan Fox
Ah, I don’t buy it. This seems very political. I do like that she stands for the fact that a chick doesn’t have to have monster boobs for them to be sexy, but this chick is not a top flight titty talent.
I mean, come on. She doesn’t have the chops and never will until she orders that full upgrade. Right? She’s got average J’s just for a regular girl, but in Hollywood, she’s squarely below average. Hell, most of the regular women walk around with better ones than that. Not even close.
10. Beyonce
Huh? Did I miss something? I don’t know, maybe B’s tittays wrote the lyrics to “Upgrade”…wait no, that was Jay Z. Curses. I hate to do this because I like Beyonce a lot. But she has no damn business on this list.
I think she’s beautiful, but if you forced me to diss her, right after I spoke on that assortment of unacceptable weaves, I’d go right to the breasts. I mean, she’s keeping it real and natural as she should and she looks damn good chest and all.
So there you have it. Are you satisfied? I’m not. I mean, where was Kim Kardashian, Halle Berry, JESSICA BIEL, hell, Mel B., Gisele….I mean, the list goes on and on. Sorry, I can’t endorse this list period. Let me give you my list.
1. Lindsay Lohan
2. Scarlett Johansson
3. Jessica Simpson
4. Kim Kardashian
5. Salma Hayek
6. Jessica Biel
7. Katherine Heigl (what can I say, that pic is still in my head)
8. Halle Berry
9. Mel B.
10. Audrina Patridge (hey, she’s already been mentioned, what could I do?)
Honorable mention: Serena Williams (don’t sleep)
Then I have to add a section for best fake boobs in the business. Christina Aguilera, Britney Spears, Tila Tequila, Pam Anderson and Heidi Montage.
Damn, after all that, even I’ve grown tired of tittays. I must be getting really old.
- Lake
http://www.celebrityplasticpics.com/linsday_lohan_plastic_surgery.htm
lindsey logan
http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/005046.html
selma hyatt also
http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/007264.html
selma hyatt
http://plasticsergeant.com/home/celebrity/breast-aug/salma-hayek–boob-job
halle berry also
http://www.findmysurgeon.com/blog/breast-augmentation/halle-berry-breast-implants/
halle berry
http://www.celebrityplasticpics.com/halleberry.htm
and while were at it…..
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=194371>
http://blogs.vibe.com/ball/00_jkidd_01.jpg
one up, one down… one east, one west – WTF?!
7. Jessica Biel…..man, this is one badazz White Girl.
Megan Fox … shoutout to the natural perky joints. Luv’ em!]]>
Rosario Dawson. Gotta co-sign with Will on that Jennifer Connelly tip. And you guys are keeping it real on the Scar-Jo, Jessie Biel mentions too. But, damn, Rosario gets no love round these parts. Surprising, considering that she’s smoking hot, got talent, and has quietly pulled off a couple of superior sexy-times movie scenes.]]>
Christina Ricci who actually had a reduction. I can remember a chick in one of my classes once said, “I don’t like Christina Ricci, her boobs are too big.”]]>
http://studentweb.hunter.cuny.edu/students/jladino/Selma%20Hayek.jpeg
http://pwbeat.publishersweekly.com/blog/wp-content/2007/09/salma_hayek07.jpg
http://a59.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/37/l_fba116f23333209b490a69137d163492.jpg
classic figure-8 pose! (Hollywood girlies, pay attention)
http://shotsdaily.com/gossip/photos/salma-hayek-breasts.jpg
the NSFW joint… http://www.allcelebrity.ru/nude_pictures/salma_hayek/1.jpg>
http://plasticsergeant.com/home/celebrity/breast-aug/salma-hayek–boob-job>
http://www.celebrityplasticpics.com/salma_hayek_plastic_surgery.htm>
http://plasticsergeant.com/home/celebrity/breast-aug/halle-berry–armpit-scar#t6yrslb6680sC1AnIJjTlQ>
http://www.theinsider.com/news/48075_Kim_Kardashian_Before_Plastic_Surgery
Even if she is younger here in the above pic, she still would have been old enough to show the beginnings of the boobs she claims that are hers today.
Fact is, the diameter of her breasts now are huge in comparison to what they were when she was 16 or so.
I can see her getting older and getting heavier and breast getting bigger, filling out and all, but there is no way in hell that those “cute little no cleavage before breasts” were going to look like the knock out breasts she has now unless they were enhanced…. and you can bank on that!
Now don’t get me wrong, She is the biz, stunning as she could be, and I wish her well and much success, but as a plastic surgery assistant for the last 16 years I have seen my share of patients before and after results.
Kim K has had an excellent boob job.
Just look at Selma Hyatt’s transformation and be convinced that even if you are a top notch simi stacked babe, there is always room for improvement. And we know that Selmas boobies are fo’ damn sho’ enhanced… and to die for!
As a matter of fact I doubt that there is a babe in Hollywood who hasn’t upgraded herself someway somehow.
Funny thing is, if hollywood only hired and groomed natural chicks for stardom, without any surgery or enhancements at all, there would be alot less starletts to admire and a ton of mud ducks on the silver screen.
I have seen regular woman on the streets way finer than the ladies we call our starletts today.]]>
http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/005186.html
http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/005188.html
http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/005187.html
I can spot that a mile away, I dont care what her father says. she might have had natural boobs once ago in her life but what she is sportin now are some enhancements.
They are as round as oranges and slightly disfigured unless she has on a good bra.
Its so sad that they have elected to give credit for the best real boobs to the fake boob recepient catergory.
I’m out!]]>
http://famousplastic.com/category/good-plastic-surgery/
I’ll tell ya….Yes they are gorgeous, but once again they are not all hers.]]>
http://usversusthem.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/kim-kardashian-ass-gel-debate.jpg
DOES NOT TURN INTO THIS,
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v329/reylas1/OO.gif
This is what a hydrogel booty looks like folks.
just ask any stripper in Los Angeles to Atlanta and New York
Its the rage. Yes, Kim had a nice wide arse as she developed into a young woman but she clearly did not have the ba dunk a dunk shes rockin now, and thats real talk.
Thats why she polks it out at anyone or anything with a camera. She is still getting use to having that behind her damn self.
When referring to a real ass look up Jlo
she obviously was born with her payload and isn’t obsessed with it
And comparing pictures of her in the late teens to present-day pictures, there is certainly a “huge” difference in boob size, just like MEL B.
The size is much larger and more defined, and the only explanation to the burst of perfect growth would be breast implants. Kim sports the tell-tale signs of breast implants, including the rounded and super-projected boob look.
You can see it plain as day. Its obvious shes got a few plastic surgeon friends, a few close friends but to us in the world of enhancements …we know the truth. we see it everyday.]]>
http://photobucket.com/image/kim%20kardashian/blue-fang/27b1.jpg?o=>
http://photobucket.com/image/kim%20kardashian/blue-fang/27b1.jpg?o=>
http://i12.tinypic.com/4yothyv.jpg>