I feel bad for Solange Knowles, I really do.  It has to be hard being the bootleg version of a world famous celebrity.  She is like a real-life female version of Johnny Drama.  I mean Beyonce was in Destiny’s Child, one of the most successful Multi-Platinum groups in recent history…Solange can’t go Plastic.  Beyonce is married to Jay-Z…Solange was briefly married to some future-ex NFL player and is a young mother.  Beyonce is super thickums…Solange doesn’t quite match up.  Or does she?

Now I don’t know what the hell she’s thinking with that crazy ass outfit and eye makeup, but that outfit is fitting tight and right.  Do you hear me Solange?  Can you let me know what you’re workin with?

Hey the girl is working with what she has.  Maybe she’ll thicken up like her big sis one day when she grows up.  Hey girl, since you decided to look like Freak of the Night Rainbow Bright how bout you let us peep that tail game?

Naaaaah.  You can’t just throw a hip out on it and expect Us Versus Them to accept that there might be some unexpected arse hiding back there.  We’re gonna have to go to the video footage.

Damn.  I think that is a fail tail from every angle.  One the plus side, you can get your very own crazy ass rainbow tights.

Yeah, I don’t know why they used male models on this one.  There is absolutely not one single situation known today or that may be known in the future where a man should don that outfit.  Never.

Ever.

-Brock