Last week I talked about guys who can’t figure out why they aren’t getting a woman. Andrew on the Real World didn’t realize that in order to have a woman treat you like a man (including have sex with you), you need to act like a man. But now these guys have taken it to [...]
I’m just saying, they might be the same chick. Apparently Katy Perry was the one on American Idol last night.
And Zooey Deschanel has been in every movie I’ve watched in the last week ((500) Days of summer and Yes Man if you care).
Dark hair, big eyes and big…uhhhh…eyes. They might rip the time space continuum [...]
Longtime Us Versus Them readers know that I am a rational person. I analyze, maybe even tend to over analyze almost everything. I take pride in it. In fact, I think it is what makes me one of Us. The reason I am here at UvT to remind the world what separates Us from Them. [...]
I used to have a bunch of shitty jobs, so I used to think I was also some sort of narcoleptic, sleep deprived zombie who couldn’t keep my eyes open through an entire workday. Then I realized that you don’t actually get sleepy at work when you like your job. If you fall asleep, in [...]
It was a special edition. Custom made.
Oh, wait, I found it.
Dammit, I need to learn not to leave those things laying around.
-Brock
People don’t really understand what it is like to be a Black man. I don’t go around looking for problems but sometimes things happen that just aren’t right. You don’t want to think it is racist, but you just wonder. Like when you type “why do black people” into Google, it returns the most common [...]
I’m clearly in the wrong business because if this is what is passing as a clever new product idea than Lake and I need to get to production of those Ho Brand Condoms. Check out the Handjob.
From the name to the product design to the acting to all the double entendres in that commercial, that [...]
There are lots of reasons you shouldn’t drive a minivan. It may be the best way to ship a gang of kids around, it maybe easy to load and unload but it is the most uncool vehicle in the world. Check this video from the streets of the NYC.
Man, you really forget how much weight [...]
Reebok finally put together a product we can endorse here at Us Versus Them. They call them the Easytone, and just like that Orangina ad we ran last week, you would think I directed it.
Now I know the world has changed when major companies are talking about pumping up your tail in mainstream commercials.
Oh, Kimmy [...]
Now see, you try to do something for the people, and some big celebrity comes along and jacks your style. Lake and I have been working on the 100% guaranteed Ho Brand Condoms for years and finally hit the streets two months ago. You know we stay between you and those hos. We had the nilla please [...]
The sound on this one is a unsexy 4 on the UvT NSFW Scale, but the visuals are clean and it is worth it. Turn your speakers down though.
Just a little extra Us Versus Them style humor to send you into the weekend right.
-Brock
I’ve been out of the mix this weekend, but when I started bumping around the internet I found out that Sammy Sosa went to the Latin Grammy’s this weekend. You remember Sammy don’t you? He was one of the top homerun sluggers during the Balco era of baseball stats.
I’m not gonna lie, I saw Sammy [...]
Us Versus Them isn’t all about sports, ladies, politics and tail pieces. Sometimes we like to make you think. So here are a few optical illusions to keep all of our loyal readers on their toes.
Always a classic. Do you see an old woman or a young maiden?
How does someone even paint that? Do they [...]
Sure superheroes can save the world, but what do they do with their powers the rest of the time?
Artist Dulce Pinzon, figures it out. She went undercover and caught them in their natural habitat.
Damn, I feel like the Hulk has lost a step. Why would he be mad about unloading a truck, and shouldn’t he [...]
My admiration for the geniuses over at American Apparel is well documented. Dov Charney brings the sexy. I admit, I like a certain kind of woman, but sometimes sexy is sexy. Like this chick from American Apparel.
I know what you’re thinking, blonde hair, skinny chick…Who are you and what did you do with Brock Hardon? [...]
When you are T-Pain and Jay-Z declares the end to the way you make a living, what do you do?
Do you curl up into a ball and die? Do you start to practice your singing so you no longer have to run autotune? Nah…you blow it up. You drop the auto tune app on iTunes [...]
But she’s got a black girl haircut.
What do you ask for when you go get a haircut? Let me get it long in the front with a part on the side with it real short in the back…but, you know…spikey. Oh and can you throw some highlights in it? Yeah, that’s perfect.
If she has black [...]
Or this might happen. Check the names over there on the right.
Classy move from the IT proficient asshole. “MY BITCHES HOUSE” might be the hottest wireless access point name out right now. I’m gonna change the wireless access points in the office when I get there tomorrow morning. Any suggestions?
-Brock
Now see, I glorify the tail and someone had to go on ahead and take it too far. They have taken my beloved tail crease and defiled it.
Whoever invented this thought it was such a good idea that they both wanted to get it out into the public and said that there was a “patent [...]
Lake couldn’t believe it when KFC rolled out the Kentucky Grilled Chicken a few months ago. They were about twenty years late in realizing that that fried chicken heat was more than the American public was ready for. Do they think Boston Market just came out? Not only do they fry it Original recipe, but [...]
I understand that some inventions just aren’t going to make a lot of sense. I also understand that there are things just for the ladies that I don’t understand. I also understand that guys only think about sex all the time. Sometimes all of those things come together in odd ways, but that still doesn’t [...]
I still think baseball is kinda a bum sport. I have to acknowledge that there is a lot of technical skill involved with pitching and hitting, but beyond that I just see 7 other dudes standing out in the outfield waiting for something to happen. I know baseball is a game of stats, can someone [...]
And to think, all I had to do was get lessons from this kid.
I like how he really tucks it in at the end to leave himself some space to get out.
-Brock
The Amazon Kindle sounded like a good idea. Like the iPod of books. being able to carry your entire music collection is great, so being able to carry your entire book collection should be equally awesome, right?
Not quite the same as the music collection since you probably read a few books at a time tops, [...]
I come from a long line of master riggers. My Grandfather doesn’t have a single thing in his house that doesn’t have a piece of duct tape on it. The seatbelt in his car has been modified with bubble wrap and duct tape so now it looks more like one of those NASCAR bracing system. [...]
